A great philosopher.
A decent actor.
The most delicious edible matter known to man.
Bacons, all three. Coincidence? You tell me.
No, this is nothing like Selleck Waterfall Sandwich. I will not limit the scope of my musings here to the writings, activities, and/or flavor of the aforementioned Bacons, but you can be sure that none of them are ever far from my mind. Or my mouth.
Allow me to explain how the Bacon Triumvirate inspires and influences me:
Francis Bacon (1561–1626) was the father of empiricism and the scientific method, both of which are grievously undervalued by the masses these days. While he was not quite an atheist, he wrote "Atheism leaves a man to sense, to philosophy, to natural piety, to laws, to reputation: all which may be guides to an outward moral virtue... but superstition dismounts all these and erecteth an absolute monarchy in the minds of men: therefore atheism never did perturb states." Dig it.
Kevin Bacon needs no introduction, I'm sure. In addition to being a reliably solid actor and a hip musician (as one half of the Bacon Brothers), he is also the center of the universe, as demonstrated by The Oracle of Bacon. More importantly, he is a devoted liberal who gives generously to charities and progressive causes. He's good people.
Bacon tastes really, really good. There is not a food on earth that is harmed by the addition of bacon. Not bacon bits, mind you. Real bacon. I defy anyone to name anything edible that wouldn't taste even better with bacon in, on, wrapped around, or stuffed inside of it. Disagree? For a donation of $25, I will make a video of myself accepting and enjoying your challenge and post it here. Incidentally, I will pay a reward of $25 for a well-photoshopped image of Kevin Bacon eating bacon while reading Francis Bacon. Please send submissions to baconcubed@gmail.com.
Lastly, I'll quickly detail how I intend to organize things here. I will use the Facebook and Twitter feeds to share the most interesting and/or entertaining news, essays, videos, and such that I encounter throughout the day. I will also attempt to publish an occasional (weekly?) digest of "Must Read" materials, just in case you don't happen to have as much time on your hands as I do at the moment. My own rants will appear in this column.
And that's that. Out of the frying pan, into the fire. Stay tuned...
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